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Globe and Mail Article

One problem I had with past Nuit Blanches is that they hype everything up and then you go and see it and it's a let down. This year they avoided the hyperbole, but I still find some of this stuff is so out there, that anyone could do it. In fact while waiting in line for Massey, me and my girlfriend came up with a dozen different "art" ideas that we could submit, that would have no real substance but still have that "whoa that's deep" feeling.

My girlfriend's dad is an artist for a living and paints (some examples of his work is here: http://kinnetikwebdesigns.com/NiagaraGallary/beard2.html ) and considering how realistic and nearly photographic those paintings are, and the skill level needed to do that, it's hard to appreciate much of this "out there" art where anyone could have come up with it.

You should submit your ideas and see it they get implemented! The Globe and Mail had a number of sarcastic suggestions but I'd actually like to see them done. My favourite is the Surrounded by Hate one. :D

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/national/toronto/faux-nuit-blanche/article1310733/
Mark Schatzker

Last updated on Friday, Oct. 02, 2009 09:08PM EDT


Won't You Please Stand Up

Taking place in a simulacrum of a Toronto performance venue, a group of mediocre international artists – including a mediocre German pianist, a mediocre Russian ballerina, a mediocre Austrian opera singer, and a mediocre Israeli violinist – give middling performances of substandard works to an audience of actual Torontonians, who greet each rendition with an immediate and overwhelming standing ovation. As the night concludes, a meta-audience will be brought in to greet to each standing ovation with an even more enthusiastic standing ovation and screams of, “Encore!â€

Tent of Endless Funding Announcements

In this award-winning installation that challenges conceptions of “ritual†and “gullibility,†a seemingly infinite procession of municipal, provincial and federal politicians announce major infrastructure projects for the City of Toronto, including money to fix the waterfront, bury the Gardiner Expressway, construct a rail link to Pearson International Airport, and a subway link to York University. Each announcement is met by canned applause while a square of asphalt suspended next to the podium slowly crumbles.

The Ossington Hipster Project

In this ambitious and internationally significant installation, an Ossington Avenue patio is filled with hipsters wearing white Ray-Ban Wayfarers, sweatbands and ironic T-shirts, all eating locally made charcuterie and drinking Mill Street Tankhouse Pale Ale while listening to the Dum Dum Girls. In a stunning feat of group choreography, the hipsters remove their Ray-Ban Wayfarers at the stroke of midnight and simultaneously realize they all look like idiots, at which point they begin tweeting self-indulgently about their “epiphany,†which they vow to commemorate with a knuckle tattoo.

Surrounded by Hate

The anti-Toronto griping of a Cape Breton fiddle player is regionally differentiated from the hate narratives of a Montreal Anglophone or the “centre of the universe†denunciations of a Vancouver sea kayaker. In this collaborative and poly-perspectival project that underscores the import of envy and schadenfreude to the Canadian experience, Torontonians step inside an echo chamber fitted with 1,528 speakers and are subjected to a chorus of angry anti-Toronto rants, including declarations of scorn from first nations people, Gulf Islands hippies, Quebecois, new Canadians, and Ezra Levant, all recorded specifically for Nuit Blanche.


Forest Hill Housewife Wax Museum

This city's most fascinating trophy wives are rendered in stunning verisimilitude while prerecorded interviews playing on a continuous loop divulge their opinions on raging Forest Hill controversies such as: Pusateri's or Whole Foods – which is better? What NOT to wear to this year's Brazilian Ball; and, the Recession: Will the help finally work harder or will they just steal the silverware? (Sponsored by Toronto Life magazine.)

A World Without Cheese

Here Torontonians wander through Dundas Square repurposed as a life-size recreation of the Entertainment District on a Saturday night, exact in every detail save one: the 905ers have all vanished. Absent the thumping base, puddles of vomit, souped-up Lexuses and constant smell of too much cologne, the exhibit forces downtown residents to re-evaluate our intriguing and intangible relationship with suburban peoples.
 
That wrestling thing was the biggest disappointment, as I was there 3 times and didn't see any wrestlers. All I saw was a bunch of people standing around the ring blindfolded, doing nothing at all except jumping once in a while. What was the point of that? I heard much grumbling from the audience. I don't think anybody enjoyed it, and yes, we had to line up to get in. After all that time in line, I wanted to see some serious man-on-man action. Oh well, there's always next year.

I went in via Elizabeth Street, there was no line up at all. I noticed at that "Vodka Pool" thingy a long line up at one entrance, but there had to be at least six other doors with no one waiting.
 
City Hall was having technical problems when I first saw it. And a couple other times when I passed by. This lessened its impact. It was working when I passed by at 2AM, but my attention walking through the area at that time was on all the garbage left everywhere around the food trucks. At 5AM the words NUIT and NOIR were alternating. This may have been an admission of frustration by the artist.

Starting at midnight I waited over an hour to get into Massey Hall. The lineup was an okay spot to watch the passing activity from. And maybe the most spectacular audio-visual sensation of the evening occurred while I was waiting along Victoria Street, when a helicopter lifted off the hospital across the road, passing over us just above the buildings, against a backdrop of light clouds outlined in moonlight. Inside, the performance was the most ambitious and coherent project of the night. However, after waiting in line that long, I was allowed in midway through the performance. When they finished swinging the lights up in the balconies and the sound guy in the orchestra seating pulled out a sandwich, all of us were moved out of the building, whether we'd been given the opportunity to see the complete performance or not.

When I was watching the wrestling there was one blindfolded male in the cage with three blindfolded young females. He was doing some heavy groping at times, and he was throwing the ladies down with much too much vigour. It was all kind of unseemly. Looking back at it from the room where actual travellers were waiting for buses and paying little attention to the art, the building did however look like a fitting environment for an old-style sweaty and smoky brawl.

RCM is a great building.

By 4AM groups of people were wandering Liberty Village with grey blankets that said MERCY. No Heineken sponsorship label was visible on the free blankets.

Next year, if it happens and I'm around, I'm riding my bike. Those on bikes and rollerblades looked like they were having fun. After 2 I spent the time I'd earlier spent waiting in event lines waiting for trains and streetcars.
 
People actually thought that the stained glass window that faced the centre court at Old City Hall was the art. Everyone was taking pictures of it. It only helped cement how much of an asset we have in this building and how much potential it holds.

And more profanely, I eternally wonder how many outsiders think the LED-tubed Arcade Building facade is a Nuit Blanche project...
 
well the promoters toned down the hype and everything went well so the media just reported it as a good success.
 
My single favourite artistic display of the night was not even an event-sanctioned artist but a kid playing chiptunes and manipulating the sounds live in front of city hall. Nothing beats 8-bit (showing my age, perhaps). I bought his CD.

We'll be doing more shows around Toronto, both guerrillas style and at real venues, so stay tuned!

We've got a little promo video here that we shot that night:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mj2gJla7A7U
 
After my three hours of Nuit Blanche I was at home by midnight, and slept for five hours. When I arrived at the St. Lawrence antique market at six o'clock the next morning there were still a few people wandering around downtown.

Big success, I'd say. Long may the art thing prosper.
 
Starting at midnight I waited over an hour to get into Massey Hall. The lineup was an okay spot to watch the passing activity from. And maybe the most spectacular audio-visual sensation of the evening occurred while I was waiting along Victoria Street, when a helicopter lifted off the hospital across the road, passing over us just above the buildings, against a backdrop of light clouds outlined in moonlight. Inside, the performance was the most ambitious and coherent project of the night. However, after waiting in line that long, I was allowed in midway through the performance. When they finished swinging the lights up in the balconies and the sound guy in the orchestra seating pulled out a sandwich, all of us were moved out of the building, whether we'd been given the opportunity to see the complete performance or not.
RCM is a great building.

By 4AM groups of people were wandering Liberty Village with grey blankets that said MERCY. No Heineken sponsorship label was visible on the free blankets.

I saw the helipcopter too! Massy Hall was definately not worth the wait. Liberty village was the best part of my night, the shelter with the blankets had the warmest feeling to it. Union station and city hall also had a great feeling to it. I enjoyed The "Im sorry" paperbag people too lol
 
Our Nuit Blanche Picks, 1 of 2

We mapped what we thought might be interesting in zones A & B. We started with a slice at Pizziola at Y+B, headed west and started off at The Telus Centre which, when all taken into account, turned out to be my favorate experience of the night. I rated each exibit/installation out of five based on my opinion and the general consensus of my friends.

"Music Inside/Out":
The lobby areas of The Conservatory had musicians performing off balconies and other areas, illuminated with colour and inside Koerner Hall beautiful voices softly rang through the air in this brilliant room. The musical related artifacts in the display cases dating back to 200 AD only added to the magic of these brilliant spaces. If your ever feeling a little down about some mediocrity around Toronto, take in a performance or a tour of The Royal Conservatory where modern and classical elegance come together in perfect harmony. To my eyes this complex works on every level, inside and out. 5/5

Koerner Hall orchestra & balcony lobby areas from Philosopher's Walk

Click on the thumbnail to enlarge, then click again on the image for full size.



Inside The Royal Conservatory



The ROM opened up for "Vanity Fair Portraits" which wasn't a choice of mine, but turned out to be interesting and fun. Three of my favorates culled from the Internet (no photographs are allowed inside the ROM). 3/5

This photo reeks of evil
bush-legacy.jpg


I just love Liza and I adore this shot
liza-minnelli.jpg


Annie Leibovitz photographs actresses at the top of their game, circa early 2000's
vanity_hollywood2001.jpg


An angelic performance artist outside the ROM. 4/5



The line for "Battle Royal" didn't seem to be moving so we caught some of it through the windows on Edward Street, that was enough. 2/5

"Speed Shift" in the north Eaton Centre corridor below Best Buy/Ryerson. Meh... 2/5



"The Reflecting Pool & Ancient of Days". The advertising board above Canadian Tire and speakers placed around the intersection are used for two video installations by Bill Viola. 3/5

"Pwn the Wall" allows locals to graffiti the side wall of Canadian Tire facing Bay Street using infrared-LED lighting instead of paint. 3/5



"The Blinking Eyes of Everything" at Church of the Holy Trinity had a long line that wasn't moving. We moved on after about 1/2 hour.

Crowds on Bay, south of Dundas Street



"Audio Parade" in the courtyard of Old City Hall. No one marched, everyone photographed. Who knew there was a courtyard in the middle of Old City Hall? Not me. 3/5 (extra point because of this space which I never knew existed)



"Hello Dave!" brings people together for "old fashioned", face-to-face chat with Dave instead of by electronic means in front of Old City Hall. 2/5

"Beautiful Light 4 Letter Word Machine" at City Hall splashed four letter words (and a few three letter words). The puke puddles began around here. 3/5



"Night Equals Day" contrasts old and new Regent Park projected in Council Chambers. 3/5

"Gone Indian" - A truck roams the financial district with dance and First Nations rhythms at earsplitting volume levels. Spotted crawling slowly in front of The Bay-Adelaide Centre on Adelaide Street St. W. 4/5

"Wild Ride" - The up's & down's of the stock market and economy are symbolized with two midway installations on Bay Street in the financial district - a slide & "The Avalache" ride. 3/5



"Vodka Pool", lobby of Commerce Court West. 2/5



"Witches Cradles", Brookfield Place. Volunteers have earplugs put into their ears and are blindfolded, later placed into a bag, lifted and then gently spun and swung in sensory deprivation bags hung from the ceiling of BP. Also, a shot of the south side of the complex. 4/5

 
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Our Nuit Blanche Picks, 2 of 2

"Imminent Departure", Union Station. Voices from multi-channel speakers placed throughout the great hall. Sound, lighting and fog machines simulate departing loved one's as they board a train to leave for unknown destinations. 4/5 (Note: the time on the clock pictured was not correct, these were taken at around 4am)



"Bright Lights Big City". DJ's spin high-energy mixes which sync to the LED lights of the CN Tower in front of The Second Cup, Front & University. Note that when I got home around 6am I tuned into 89.5FM and found the mixes out of sync by about 1 1/2 seconds, I live about a mile away from the tower. 4/5

Campbell House, "Light and Dark". No candlelight as promised, exhibit of rubber-band paintings. 1/5

"Bouncing Bride: What Goes Down Must Go Up". Fun, many smiles. 2/5

"Moon-een on McCaul" (OCA) 4/5

Several exhibits and effects combine here to send one's imagination into high gear. Are the puffy characters hanging on McCaul St. suicidal? We debated... 3/5



Back over to Bay Street from here to try "The Blinking Eyes of Everything" again at Church of the Holy Trinity but there was still a long line at 5am and it still didn't seem to be moving.

"Rabbit Balloon". Eaton Centre, Trinity Way. 3/5




"Space Becomes The Instrument", Massey Hall. A huge lineup at 5:30 along Shuter Street and down Victoria Street to the stage door. Volunteer told me it would be about a 1 hour wait.

Home we went.

.
 
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