If I can inject some levity for a moment. My friend Tom (a super smart engineer, quick witted and simply hilarious all the time) goes to Target on Saturday with his wife. Here's how it went:
So, funny story of the day....my wife dragged me to Target in Newmarket (that's not the funny part, that's actually tragic)...here's the funny part: I picked up a couple of $5.00 DVDs, including the shlock classic Zombieland (remember, keep your cardio up in case of a zombie invasion)...here's how the conversation at the cash went:
Cashier: This is an 18+ movie...I'll need to see photo ID
Me: Haha...good one
Cashier: I'm serious. Target store policy. Sorry.
Me: I'm 41...I have two kids. Seriously.
Cashier: Sorry...I still need to see your ID.
Me: Am I on Candid Camera?
Cashier: Sorry...store policy.
Me: Can I just take off my shirt and show you my one giant ab and my grey chest hairs?
Cashier (to my wife): Is he with you?
Shelly (sheepishly): Yeas...yes he is.
Cashier: Your life must be a riot.
Me: So what's it gonna be? Shirt on or off?
Cashier: I still need to see your photo ID, sir. Target store policy.
Me: Bwahahahaha! I love this joint! You people crack me up. (produces ID after much digging in Costanza sized wallet)
Cashier (deadpan): Have a nice day, sir and thank you for shopping Target.
Me (loudly, arms raised in triumph): Whoooooo! Carded at the Tar-jay! Whooooo!
Shelly: Why me?