Here's my try:
Hi! Is this the Crack Mayor?
Yeah, we got three tickets to the Jimmy Kimmel show happening this Monday on Hollywood Blvd. You can all come in if you want to answer a couple of questions, namely, do you want more US national exposure? To meet some Hollywood celebrities? We’ll see about that….
Give us a ring-ding-ding. We’d love you to come on!
Yeah, Rob, this is Jimmy ring-a-ding-dinging. Want to make a fool of yourself? Waddya think? Rob, you there?
I woke up this afternoon, with blood shot eyes
When Jimmy called me up with a big surprise
A Hollywood story with a twist
'Crack mayor goes to the Oscars' hitch
Get yourself on a plane, he said:
I’ll explain it on the way.
But we did nothing, absolutely that day, and I say
What makes this different from any other day as mayor?
I got the fever for some crack, I swear that I’ll be back
Still I need a fix
And the people on the street are laughing at me
As I wandered around, no reason to be found
People taking selfies
As I put on a silly grin
But not one is a friend
Feeling kind of groovy
With stars of the movies
-Yeah right!
But we did nothing, absolutely butkis that day, and they say:
What the hell is he doing, wandering around LA? At 44?
With my mind on the gravy, and my hands on the…
Beer, beer!
They say the election is for the taking, so I better wise up, and
Make it quick
Yeah, let’s go check out Trader Vic’s
Some press in Toronto want to hurt us,
And others did say we weren’t worth the fuss
But Jimmy Kimmel got me out here,
Told me I had nothing at all to fear
And Doug turned to me and said:
“That was great free publicity, son”
Ford got some air time, and I guess that’s something,
But I ask you:
What the hell is he doing, wandering around LA? At 44?
He’s got the fever for some coke, maybe even just a toke
Still he needs a fix
We need to fix it up, Kimmel on Monday maybe it’ll
Fix it all up.
Hell eh, LA, Hell-A, LA.
What the hell is he doing, wandering around LA? At 44?